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Role of a Christian father

In our Asian homes, fathers often take a back seat when it comes to parenting. We assume in our chauvinistic view that our role is to bring home the dough and all matters pertaining to the home is the responsibility of our wives. However, this is not what God had intended for us. The examples of Joseph and Eli clearly show otherwise.

The story of Joseph as a father is told in Matthew 1-2. While many of us like to focus on the role of Mary in bringing Jesus into the world, the account in Matthew shows Joseph as a very involved father and reveals two things about fatherhood. First, God has very specific roles for fathers to play in rearing children. God could have very well left everything to Mary and gave her all the revelation. But He did not. He chose to involve Joseph right from the start when an angel appeared to announce the birth of Jesus. Joseph was also made responsible for the safety of baby Jesus as he was the one who received the vision and made the decision to leave for Egypt. With regard to how and where Jesus was to be brought up, it was again Joseph’s call as he was again the one who heard twice from God regarding where to go after Herod’s death. Second, fathers, being the heads of their respective households, have the responsibility to walk closely with God not just for their own salvation, but also for the sake of their families. Joseph had to have a personal relationship with God to be able to hear and respond to His warnings so promptly. If there was any doubt on Joseph’s part regarding God’s revelation, things could have been very different.

While Matthew gives us a glimpse of the responsibilities of fatherhood, a tragic story told in 1 Samuel 2-4 is a grim warning of what could go wrong if fathers abdicate their role in child rearing. Though actively serving the Lord as the high priest, Eli failed to teach his two sons well and they grew up to be an abomination to him and to the Lord. They had no regard for God, were described as “wicked men” (1 Samuel 2:12) and corrupted the prescribed sacrifice and offering for the house of the Lord. As a result, Eli's family line incurred the wrath of God. His two sons died in battle, he died when he received the bad news, and his daughter-in-law died shortly after in labour. And the bible clearly attributes the blame to Eli. “For I told him that I would judge his family forever because of the sin he knew about; his sons made themselves contemptible, and he failed to restrain them.” (1 Samuel 3:13). Notice no one else was made accountable for the behaviour of the two sons – not the mother, not anyone else. Just Eli. This story shows in no uncertain terms that God’s plan is for fathers to take responsibility in the upbringing of their children, in molding their character and instilling discipline.

As Father’s Day is just around the corner, this message goes out to all the fathers out there (and fathers to be). What kind of father are you? And where are you in your children’s life? May the Lord point you in Joseph’s path and not Eli’s.

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